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Corina B.




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Run Ins with Establishments [
]
[ mood | aggravated ]

So, I haven't updated my irl diary, which is basically taking my LJ posts, printing them out and pasting them into my diary...

Anyways, here's another for the stack.

I've recently gotten back from a series of .... well, there was Anime North, then two days of retail work, then running off to a conference, which included a day of crack of dawn travelling, a couple of days of waking up totally outside of my regular schedule, and then another crack of dawn day of travelling.  And then another two days of retail shifts. The combination which has my sleep schedule going "we sleep when now???" and somewhat mimicking other people's sleep schedules.

I honestly don't expect it to last, but I'd also like to be pleasantly surprised...

Anyways, it worked somewhat in my favour today, cause I had a 10:15 AM doctor's appointment.  Not with my regular doctor, who sort of knows better than to schedule me in the morning, but with someone filling in for her.  Yeah, this totally bodes well.  But hey, never know, right? Optimism people!

It took my alarm clock twenty minutes to wake me up.  Not totally bad, since I actually got up.  Oh, I should mention that I'm sleeping with my mattress on the floor. Why? Because my mattress has a huge dip in it and needs to be replaced.  So my parents have offered their old queen sized bed, which is still in good shape. They were suppose to come over yesterday to drop it off and we rearrange furniture today.  However, the box spring wouldn't fit in the van that they were borrowing from other people, and since I've already pulled apart and folded up my bed frame... sleeping on the floor! Puffy was overjoyed; she didn't have to jump too far to annoy me at 2 AM.  (yes, I took photos)

But back to this morning, I got up, got dressed, and got to the doctor's office early enough to run to the Tim Horton's for a breakfast wrap and cappacino.  And then I waited in the waiting room.  I was there EARLY.  Doc was running late. Sigh.

I'd wear the noise cancelling head phones I picked up in the airport coming back from the conference, but then I wouldn't be able to hear my name being called.  This doc doesn't realize I'm autistic, I think. Nope, no no. Get the autistic woman with immune disorders out of the waiting room is a good idea. Yes?

Doctor"s VisitCollapse )

Anyways, it was a relatively short wait for my bloodwork.  I really do need to right away tell them not to bother with my left arm, that twenty years of bloodwork means the veins in that arm just don't cooperate.  Save them time and me a stab in the arm.

I went to the pharmacy to drop off my drug card, tried to see whether I could get a refill for a prescription.  Alas, cause it was last filled in April 2014 (??) and is "as needed" (what?), I got to get a renewal from my doc.  Which currently has a fill in. Awesome.  I let them fax in the request, but didn't bother to stick around.  Knowing my doctor's office, it might be a day or so.  But it's good to know that I don't actually have to be taking that med on a daily basis, cause I haven't been...

I went to the library, dropped off some books, picked more up.  Went to the branch near my place to pick up a specific book. While I was at it, I thought that I'd drop in at the YMCA and take a look at whether it was really worth it to try for a membership.

Maybe it is that I haven't been taking my medication, maybe it's the whole money situation (school, the cost of conferences, and just trying to get by), maybe it's everything. But the interaction just kinda felt depressing. I had picked up a flyer on the financial assistance program and a copy of the pool schedule.  It seemed like an easy enough process, I just don't know that I can afford a membership, what with school, a cat, and well, just being.

As I was thinking I had what I came for and was going to leave, a staff member approached, and offered to see how much I'd pay in membership fees.  If I heard correctly (oh boy), something like $30/month. Because I make more than $10,000/year.  Which is, less than a full membership, yeah, but um, that's about a week of food, and like, four years ago it was $20/month... but then, I wasn't working and ODSP paid less... and I was in a non-profit housing, so I recieved less too... can you see the catch-22??

Now, don't get me wrong, the Y has lots of good programs and stuff.  But damn, the only way through an appeal process is, and I quote the staff member I saw, "an invasive look at where your money goes".  Oh, and of course, I could totally skip this process and volunteer and within three months (come in once a week or something like that) and get a free membership.

I once tried to get a city fitness membership.  Which is something like $10 for, I dunno, a year, if you qualify through the ministry of community and social services.  Except that when I tried to apply, they had run out of funding for the program for the year, and couldn't offer it for the rest of the year.

And I thought, hey, the Y is right there, and a membership there means I can swim all year long instead of just in the summer!! But look, there's a catch-22 with how it sees people's income. I earn around $200-300/month through my job.  But ironically, because of the (incomplete) increases to social assistance, I cannot afford even a Y financial assistance membership, unless I let them comb through all my finances.

Oh, the volunteer thing?  Lemme think... it really depends, doesn't it? On what they can find for me to do, and whether I can even do it.  Cause lemme count all the ways I do not want to do cleaning at all in any way.  And then there's the whole, "holy shit, I'm autistic and introverted, and I have a sleep disorder and totally do not have the spoons for that."

Yes, yes.  It's a great way to get out in the community.  I agree.  Nice option for those of us who have just been screwed over by the social assistance catch-22 in their assistance program, to basically work for their membership.  (sorry, I did free labour once... okay, I did it more than once if you're counting the "community hours" thing in high school; not impressed)

It's just, feels so wrong that the YMCA says it's dedicated to making sure the community is healthy and all that jazz, yet the process to do so is so... invasive. 


Swing With Me

Pain in the Arm [
]
About a week ago, I got the news that my sister in law was going to have her baby on that following Wednesday.  This isn't about the baby, which by the way, I'm an aunt!  This is about what I did after that when I was too excited about the baby to concentrate on my paper; I sort of went on sky rim and started a new game.  I wanted to see how long it would take me to play the main quest all the way through.  Unfortunately, I ended up doing just that, in 12 straight hours.
I do not recommend it.  Especially when you have a paper to write, and you write your notes by hand.  At some point during the week, if not earlier, it became really hard for me to write and type.  As a result, I've taken up using speech recognition on my computer to type up my essay.
However, by today it has become difficult for me to even write a few words.  At work, I was sent home because it was suspected than I might have carpal tunnel syndrome.  I went to the walk in clinic run by my doctor's office and saw a doctor there.  She doesn't think that I have carpal tunnel, but thinks I have tendinitis instead, which from what I know is pretty much the same home treatment.
She gave me a prescription for ibuprofen 600 mg, and recommendations for a splint and topical gel.  After picking up ibuprofen, the splint, and the topical gel, I went to see Furious 7.  Now I am at home and I have made myself some curry.  I plan on watching criminal minds while eating before going to bed.  Night all!

2 Dreams Swing With Me

Sick and Tired [
]
[ mood | sick ]

I’m pretty sure I have a cold or something; one week of sore throat, headaches and body aches, and now the ever-dripping nose? Plus a cough that started in my throat, and now is both in my chest and throat? (luckily, not a bad cough)  Everything is on the “barely manageable” side, but I’ve called in sick two days cause omg, sometimes it dips into “wtf” and I drug myself up to the eyeballs and winkle my nose at chicken noodle soup. It’s not bad, just persistent, and like any time I get sick, it’ll linger for a month, I’ll bet. Oh yes, and did I mention the sneezing? Every few minutes, major sneezing.  My system is trying to fight something off.

The question of course, is whether or not to go to my doctor.  It’s sometimes hit or miss; some docs are like “you have this, this and this, here is this meds even though it’s probably just a cold”.  Others are like “it’s just a cold, rest up and take up/why are you here?”  The fact that I’m taking cough syrup with codeine should say something.

The nice thing is that I know my dad is home.  If I call in sick again tomorrow/today, I can see whether I can get him to take me to the doctor and not have to worry about effects of meds plus driving.


Swing With Me

Yay I'm Awake! [
]
I actually did stuff yesterday. Sort of.
I managed to wake up at 7, 8 AM, and take my ADHD meds. For anyone who knows me irl, I haven't been able to do that in a long time, and if I do, it's usually for short bursts before lapsing back into my 5AM-1 or 3 PM sleep schedule. I get eight hours, it just depends on when I feel I can sleep, which tends to be after 5 in the morning. Yes, there is a sleep disorder for this, and yes, this has been going on for over a year, more like two years. I just haven't gone to the sleep specialists because I know for a fact that melatonin doesn't help me; it kicks up my anxiety.

Anyways, back to yesterday and productivity. Okay, yes, I did promptly fall back to sleep till about 1PM, giving me about 12 hours of sleep. However, I did get up and start working on my assignment due Monday. I did some reading, and some thoughtful contemplation. What? It's a reflection paper; got to reflect in order to write it.

I will admit, I got distracted on tumblr, and with cleaning my desk space, and well, washing my cosplay wig. And, um, organizing my yugioh cards (no, I don't play a lot). But that can be seen as its own form of productivity, right?
I also did some writing on Starship Subject 392, and hope to have another chapter up soon.

I got to bed at 4, realized that my CPAP mask is leaking, so I'm going to have to get new stuff. I woke up at 7 today, and took my ADHD meds, and my cat promptly got me up for reals by not letting me lie in bed with my thoughts and insisting she knead my belly.

I figure today I work on my assignment, get a CPAP estimate sent out to ODSP, take ALL my meds (not just my new asthma ones), and um, pick up my new daily inhaler from the pharmacy. Can I manage it? I dunno, but it's only 10 in the morning, and ... Rain?

Swing With Me

Allergy Testing [
]
[ mood | chipper ]

Today was my allergy appointment, yay!!!  Finally!!!

An 18 month waitlist, a postponed appointment due to a blackout, and one frantic "I'm going to be late, I just woke up" phone call later.  Luckily, I wasn't actually late, I was right on time, but I don't regret calling because the staff was just so nice about it.

I only wish that I had known more about how long the appointment was going to last, so I didn't spend so much on parking. My credit card is broke, so using the chip on it doesn't work.  I have to swipe or paypass tap.  But it works on parking machines, so I hope that it won't cause an issue when I go to Toronto this weekend. Trying to pay for parking for a weekend without a credit card would be a pain.

Anyways, as for the appointment itself.  The doctor ran through my symptoms and history with allergy and asthma medications, and then examined my ears, mouth, nose, my breathing and heart.

I went to get some testing done, pinpricks on both arms, and some breathing tests.

The results were negative for the pinpricks.  Which doesn't mean anything, doc says.  It just means that I might be allergic to something which 1) they don't have a shot for and 2) something that they can't test for, like specific flower or tree pollen.  I know that I am not allergic to dust mites and cats though.  As Puffy is currently using my arm as a pillow, I'm happy about.

The asthma test didn't result in positive, but it doesn't rule it out either; it just means I'm doing fine right now.

What the doc said I have is non-allergic AND allergic rhinitis; in other words, my nose is stuffy even without allergies as well as with allergies, and stuff that I might not exactly be allergic to can irritate it. Combined with my very-likely asthma, this means I get a new set of inhalers and nasal sprays.

Well, the nasal spray isn't new; I just haven't been using it for very long and haven't gotten it refilled. The inhalers are new.  I get one of those daily inhalers as well as an as-needed inhaler.  I even got samples!! And the only thing I don't have a prescription for is the nasal moisturizer I'm suppose to use before my nasal spray. Because nose bleeds.

So I'm to try out these new inhalers and nasal sprays (and not use over the counter nasal sprays, because those are actually harmful and addictive) and return in three months!! Here's hoping it all works!! 


2 Dreams Swing With Me

Starship Subject 392 [
]
[ mood | accomplished ]

So I wrote story today. Just an idea that's been floating about my head during evenings. I thought I'd just jot it down, and.... yeah, instead of writing my essay today, I wrote a chapter of this instead:

http://archiveofourown.org/works/2702675/chapters/6048584

Thinking of maybe moving some of my other original works there too, like Insoden and Paranoia.  It would be nice to get them onto an archieve and into the way of readership.

and yes, I totally named Luka Wilson after Fireball.

I REGRET NOTHING!!!!!



Also, I have discovered the joys of men's pyjama pants.  They have POCKETS.  And fit.  Why can't girl clothes be so reasonable?  I'm literally sitting here in men's pants and shirt, because it fits better for cheaper with the graphics I want.

Anyhow, back to the grindstone... 


Swing With Me

my layout [
]
[ mood | infuriated ]

I  just noticed my layout theme... is not acting right on my main LJ page....

It works fine on my Friend's List.

**squints**

It's cause it's S1 isn't it?  LJ keeps prompting me to upgrade to S2, but I'm scared I'll lose my theme if I do...

I love my theme.  I've had it for so many lovely years, and I really don't want to change it now.  Especially since I know nothing about coding.  Well, nothing about the coding languages that would be useful in this case.  


1 Dream Swing With Me

October Pain and Panic [
]
So the past month has been either non-stop migraines or non-stop panic attack (low-key panic in chest with SPIKES), and my meds have been barely able to keep up and I'm running out of the one that does anything against the panic. I have a doctor's appointment, but it's not until the 11th, and I don't even know whether the pharmacy will do a pity refill since the prescription is from 2012.

Yeah, the meds have probably expired, but they're all I have and I just woke up today with SPIKES.

AND I'm working on a conference proposal (well, my part is almost done), an assignment for class, regular class work, running ASDay, and work today.

3 Dreams Swing With Me

wobbling around [
]

I'm procrastinating on my assignment due Wednesday and Puffy has stolen my desk chair.
I don't mind much, cause I'm still in the pen and paper draft stage and I have a large, canary yellow legal pad with my notes, the sheet with the questions, and apparently that's all I need to write 500 words to write a critical analysis on a documentary on the rise of the Enigma Machine. 500 words, just as we've started the course. And most of us aren't history students; actually I think you can't be a history student to take it, or at least this code of the course since it's an elective.

I'm thinking that maybe switching to the canary legal pad will help get over the slight writng block I have with Insoden. I also still feel guilty with not updating all my comics. I want to update!!! Why don't I? What's stopping me? Why do I wait for *the muses* to wake up, for the *characters* to wake up? Why not wake them up myself?

I dropped a class. I was going to finish all my electives this term. But the bad panic attacks started coming back again. I hate them. And I don't know whether it's my meds, my grief from Nibbles dying, seasonal depression, or some sort of anemia thing. Or whether I should go back to the spiritual counselling again. THE PANIC ATTACKS WENT AWAY when I started my migraine meds, is what gets me.

But now I can feel it in my chest, and I know it. It wants to drag me down, and it will if I let it. Some moments it pulls, and I just have to breathe, count, try to ground myself. Sometimes I have to bite myself, not hard, not breaking the skin, just enough to feel it, to feel my body again, because otherwise it'll sweep me off and try to drag me under.

I don't know whether it's related or not, but the scratching is off and on worse too. Since about grade six, I've scratched and picked at blemishes on my skin. My shoulders and back are covered with little white scars. My youth group leader thought I had been attacked by bugs! When I had problems with dandruff, I'd scratch it until my scalp was bleeding and sore. I even pull on my eyelashes and eyebrows. When my skin is clear, it's less of a problem (except for the lashes and brows), and when I'm having anxiety issues, I tend to scratch at any area, even none blemish, or usual my usual obsessive scratch/picking areas, and/or I'll do it more. It's a combination of I don't like the blemishes being there, and it being an unconscious thing, and once I'm doing it, I can't stop, not easily, I HAVE to do it.

It's pretty much the reason why in late high school, and during university, I wore bandaids on my back and face. And why Raniground is drawn with bandaids on his face. Cause I wore them.

And I looked it up. Apparently there is such a thing as Obsessive Compulsive Skin Picking. And funny enough, I already do half of the recommended supports for it. However, cause it's a new dx and fairly unknown, there's no peer support group nearby. Yay! Maybe I'll swing by one of the online groups. I'm a fairly mild case, I think, but it's nice to not be alone, you know. Though I'm a bit concerned with where I'm picking right now: my neck. Not a good place to get too deep at.

I tried painting a bit. Even the dollar store has canvas these days, and I'm kinda feeling like not being picky. I have walls to try and cover, and if it's abstract and I don't like it, I can always try to sell it someday. But I have a massive canvas on five nails over my couch, waiting to be painted. I thought I knew what I was going to paint on it, so I brought it down, rearranging my furniture and everything (reminds me, got to bring in my AC; probably going to turn it into a side table for the winter cause it maybe/might/won't fit in my closets), and then changed my mind to something else that will take much more paint than what I have. So back up it goes.

Wow, what a post. And I was just coming on here to show everyone my notes for history class.





This is what I wrote when I posted this on tumblr:

"Some of my history notes. My favourite part is the "cause SCIENCE" and "RELATIONS shenanigans". However, we're being marked on language and grammar, so I don't think the prof would appreciate my candour.

(And yes, I was taking notes off a video; these are good notes for me, when I have the luxury to stop, pause, repeat. In a regular lecture, I don't have that luxury, usually, though Disability Studies profs are very good about pacing and repeating what they said. But there are reasons why I use a note taker; this level of note-taking is generally impossible for me in a typical classroom and lecture)"

Anyways, back to my assignment!


Swing With Me

Nibbles' Last Day [
]
I'm suppose to be eating, cause I leave for my doctor's appointment in half an hour.

We changed the date of Nibbles' last day to today.  We just don't want her to be in pain her final hours, and that's more likely the closer to the weekend we get.


What gets me is how sort of hypocritical this is.  Our family wouldn't do this to a family member, to a human, because it's a sin, but it's okay to do this to a pet.  Of course, if Nibbles were human, she'd have OHIP to cover most of her expenses, any of the blood tests she never got throughout her life, a heart replacement and treatment for the heart murmur she has, any potential life support.

But because she's a cat, we pay out of pocket, so it's okay to say no, this isn't worth a couple hundred a few years ago to do blood tests to test for diabetes or heart conditions, and then just end her life as painlessly as possible.  It just seems very unMennonite to me. Maybe because I don't see my cats, both Nibbles and Puffy as being "just pets" but as part of the family, as equal members as humans.

But I need to go now, get dressed, and try to actually eat something.  

Swing With Me

Final Days [
]
[ mood | sad ]

How do you describe mood in just one word?

The results came in. It's not good.  Both kidneys and liver are beginning to fail.  My Nibbles is a very old kitty, and she's dying.

We have the tough decision, either let her live and watch her die slowly, or do the "merciful" thing.  My mom asked for a few days to think it over, tentatively making an appointment for Friday.

I'm suppose to work both tonight and Friday, and I don't know how.  I'm expected to smile, and I don't know how to stop crying.

But I'm eating something and then gathering a few things and spending the day again at my parents, spend some time with Nibbles in what we now know for sure are her final days. 


3 Dreams Swing With Me

an Elder Kitty [
]
[ mood | hopeful ]

This was supposed to have been published on Tuesday, but my iPad LJj app has developed a fault.

I believe my last livejournal post, I was moving into my new apartment. That was back in June, and now
it is the new of August. I have moved in, and has spent the summer settling in, getting things into their
places, figuring out where I want things, how to take care of myself and my cat, how to get along with
neighbours, how to be a neighbour in an apartment building. Very good learning experiences.
And of courses, coming to grips with my new budget and planning meals for myself. Plus decorating.
Part of that was to paint myself canvas' for the bathroom. I lucked out and there were canvas for sale
at XSCargo not too long ago. I just finished up on the second one, a flowery painting inspired by Van
Gogh's Almond Blossoms. I've been trying to either match or at least coordinate with the rest of the
colours in the bathroom.
But last weekend was 20% off for employees at my work, and it was also the end of final clearance. So I
did some shopping, picked up a canvas print that's the perfect size for a wall in my front entrance. Not
too keen on what's on it, just a bunch of glasses frames. Oh sure, I bet it's some designer print that I got
for a buck minus twenty percent (80 cents, yes, I can math at least that), but I'm an artist and 80 cents is
cheap canvas.
So last night, after I waited for my flowers to dry, I pulled out the print and started painting some
background layers on it. As that was drying and I listened to the West Wing, I drafted up some sketches.
I'm thinking some of those quotes, but autism activism related.
Today I had a dentist appointment. Nothing major, just a semi-annual cleaning. Didn't even see the
dentist, just one of his dental-nurse-practitioners (I don't know what they're called, but honestly). She
cleaned my teeth, showed me where I needed to pay more attention to cause those teeth are about to
be cavities, and made some good suggestions for helping me remember to brush. Like set my phone
alarm. Also to drink water cause with all my meds, I get a dry mouth and that affects tooth care and
plaque build up. She also gave me a hourglass timer.
Afterwards, I went to Canadian Tire for painter's tape and Michaels for a large round paint brush (40%
off coupon; the brush I have from university spreads paint unevenly and is such a pain. I have a style to
develop after all!), and then I hurried home because humidity is up, air pressure is down and a thunder
storm is expected sometime tonight making me wanting the safety of my apartment. I was expecting to
spend the rest of the day watching tv and painting, but such was not the case.
Unbeknownst to me, my mother had been trying to get in touch with me, and was on my way to my
apartment with her spare set of keys (I had set my phone on silent for the Doctor Who screening the
night before and not turned it back). Nibbles is sick. She's been sort of slowing down for the past year,
as she's about 18 years old, a pretty old kitty, so we're on the look out for, you know, The Big One. But
she's not eating much, just lying not, not even lifting her head, and peeing on the floor. Mom was also
concerned about the colour of the mucus coming out of her eyes.
So I gathered up some things and prepared to spend the afternoon at my mother's, potentially saying
goodbye to my dearest cat. We let her go outside for a bit before going to the vet, and she seemed to
perk up then, gain some energy to wander off he steps and go explore the bushes. We didn't bother
with a carrier in the car, I just held her in my arms with a blanket and she wiggled free, went into the
backseat and laid down in the sun. As we were driving.
At the vet, she complained to the vet, jumped down off the examination table, wandered around, and
then founder herself a hiding corner behind a chair. The vet has gentle with her, doing the examination,
and then letting her be while we talked. Nibs, to be honest, probably had been in that room a lot. She's
seen the same vet for most of her life.
From what I can understand, there are three possibilities. Our biggest hope is that it's her thyroid, cause
it's treatable and she'll be fine just dehydrated and needing meds. Otherwise we're looking at diabetes
or kidneys, either of them in the untreatable stages. Diabetes in cats, at this age, by the time it gets to
symptoms, vet says, is usually on the other side of untreatable and she only has a few weeks.
But they're doing tests, blood and urine. They also injected some fluid under her skin to help with her
dehydration. It seems to be helping. She's perked up more later this evening, more of her grumpy
self. She went outside, explored until sunset, and then started eating! Solids and the mush I made from
mixing water with her wet food.
As I was at my parents, I did my laundry. I was going to sew, but I just wanted to keep near Nibs and she
doesn't really do stairs. Though, she might have to go downstairs; she loves the basement. Anyways,
we get the results later, and I need sleep.

Swing With Me

Anime North 2014 Report [
]
[ mood | happy ]

So I was at Anime North again this year.  I had made adjustments to my costume: a new long satin skirt, a staff, a wig, and a flower crown were my additions this year.  I need to do some minor adjustments to the staff (more ribbons!), and clean the wig.  And of course do the usual repairs with my top.  However, I need to do more extensive adjustments with the crown.  It was my first time making a flower crown, and I'm afraid I got the size wrong, both to fit properly  on my head, as well as on top of a wig.  As well, I need to order heavy steel hair pins.  I've gotten it from a good source that they are sturdy and do wonders to staying in.

As for more elaborate things, I think I will start working on a casual Red Sonya cosplay to wear during the short days/days I don't wanna wear a lot of make-up and clothes. Also, so I can work on making a new top for the fairy.  Because, well, let me explain below.

Brad and I left Thursday morning, actually an hour ahead of schedule, and we made pretty good time.  We ran into a few other attendees making the trek on our way when we stopped for food.  And we met D'Arcy in the lobby of the hotel.  We checked in, four people, no prob.  Need parking for two cars, no prob, just have the second driver come and give them the license plate.  So we grabbed all our gear and headed upstairs to settle in.  Dave arrived not too much later as I was setting up my make up, and we went down to get our badges with Rachelle.

Yeah, it was a LOOOOOOOOONG wait, about two hours to get in to pick up our badges.  But I'm so glad that we got them early.  We were even able to do our weapons check! Esther met up with us in line and hung out with us, and then we went to Jack As-tor's for dinner.  It was good to visit the place before the crowds came through.

We had planned to take an evening dip in the hotel pool, but we all were feeling tired, so we called it a night.  We went back to our room to pour over the con schedule, since Esther's ride needed to arrive. Rachelle pointed out that I needed to sign up for the Science Vs. Magic Cosplay Chess game, so I pulled out my iPad, made an account and signed myself up.  Then, once Esther's ride arrived, Brad walked Rachelle back to her hotel and we all headed to bed.

Friday

We slept in a bit.  Then Dave, Brad and I went to the hotel restaurant for breakfast.  Expensive, but good.  We decided that other con mornings, we'll be in a rush and can keep the pop tarts and breakfast bars for then.

When we got back up to the room, we gathered our swimming things and found the pool.  We splashed around for a bit, then got out.  When Brad took his shower afterwards, he changed into his Wolverine costume, not realizing that the con doesn't start until 5.  Finally, I took my shower and started changing into my costume.  After texting Rachelle, I headed to her hotel for some fixing of my staff, which got damaged shortly after weapon's check.

Meeting her roommates, and then some hot glue later, we went down to wander the con.  Unfortunately, there were a lot of lineups still, so we just ended up wandering for a bit, letting the crowds die down before heading into the dealer's room.
Something we noticed was that the maps in the guide book seemed to be off.  I hadn't checked the online version, because me and screens in crowds don't work well, so I prefer paper maps, for accessibility issues.  But entrances weren't where they said they were, and the way some of the entrances were set up, merging the pass-holders with newly bought pass-holders pass the guide-book grab table, was not planned out very well.  It made for some maze running.

It probably had to do with this being the first year Anime North had the entire TCC to ourselves, so our crowd control experts and barrier set-up people weren't completely on the ball.  They did fix it by Saturday noon, but until then, and even a bit after, there was some back tracking to figure out how to get places with a map that wasn't completely accurate.

But we found our way into the Dealer's room, and wandered the aisles. It was set up very similar to previous years, but still arranged differently.  So we had to pick our way around to find the Silver Snail.  Dave got me four Gundams, each 19.99-24.99.  At a different store, I found an RG Gundam for $45, and insisted on paying for it myself.  We also picked up a bluray of Summer Wars for $20 and a huuuuuuuuge stack of manga.  Not as much as I've been known to get, but still quite a bit of my shopping list.  I spotted Kingdom Hearts Re:Coded at a couple of places, but wasn't sure whether the price was better or worse than what I could get online.  (In the end, I did get it, since it was $24.99; the online sellers was selling it for $20, plus $4.99 shipping, so I thought getting it at AN was just as good, but then they added TAX??????? so it ended up being $28.  It was a seller from the States).

The gundams and the manga are all at my parent's for temporary storage while I move, so I'll have pictures and whatnot after!!!

Satisfied that we had done our shopping for the convention, Dave and I took our purchases back to the hotel.

I don't think we did much else that evening.  The others had turned in as well, so we all had ramen in the hotel, watched some TV, and planned a bit of our next day.

Saturday

Woke up early, had breakfast in the room (pop tarts cold) and got into cosplay.  Then we trekked across the bridge to the TCC (I hate that bridge; remind me to stop staying across the bridge) and found our way through the maze of an entrance for the cosplay chess.

It was a lot of fun!!!  I hope that the videos taken will be posted soon!!!  I know that there were two official cameras going, as well as people running around with "Media" badges taking pictures.   Unfortunately, I died pretty quickly in the game, killed by Brad of all things, as Wolverine.  But I think my prize was Moonlight Ball tickets for next year?????

I got buttons too.  AN does this button collection thing for participating in events.  Betcha I would have gotten a button if I had entered the Evil Laugh Competition.  Rachelle got a button when she signed into the Masquerade.

After grabbing a bite to eat, Dave and I tried to find panels and screenings to go into, but a lot of the smaller rooms were overflowing and really too hot.  Way too many people in too small a space.  We had to meet up with Rachelle at 6-ish to help her carry her costume into the Masquerade, so we went into the Video 1 screening room, which thankfully was one of the ballrooms and had lots of room.  So we saw a bit of the Aniplex Industry panel and their trailers (FATE STAY NIGHT!!!!!) and then watched the first two episodes of Sword Art Online.  I will have to continue watching that series; it looks interesting, and I seem to have a thing about that kind of narrative.

But we then went to wandering for a bit, ran into our friend Ena in her Tron cosplay ( I wish I had gotten pictures!!!) and then proceeded to meet up with Rachelle.

I pretty much spent the evening with Rachelle, running around with her, helping her in and out of costume, getting her glasses of water, some of the snackfood that they provided us, helping with last minute repairs.  It was fun, cause I got to see the other side of the masquerade and how it's more or less run, had a good seat for watching too when we were done on stage, and because people kept mistaking me as a contestant.  I finally had to take off my wig, and I think that helped a bit.  It was also tiring too, because it's a LOT of work!!!  We were so exhausted when we got out and were taking the costume back to the hotel, that I felt almost too tired to walk back to the hotel (I totally seriously told them to go get the car and drive, but nooooooo, I had to walk over that bridge again).

I stayed up a bit later that night, because I was packing up.  I really wanted to wear my cosplay again for another day, but taking it off, a lot of beads came off my top.  So it needs repairs.  Possibly replacement, and if I'm going into the Moonlight Ball, I need a formal outfit, since that has a dress code.  So Mom and I are going to work on a new top for the dress.

I was also really tired of being around people.  Just trying to sleep with people in the room was too much, never mind someone next to me.  There is a certain point at a convention that I can not stand to be around people, I can't do it.  Which is why having my own room is a good idea. At least, my own bed.... We'll see for next year.

Sunday

We packed up everything, had breakfast, and then moved stuff downstairs and into our cars.  D'Arcy got his stuff to the luggage room, cause he was getting picked up by a friend. Then we checked out of the hotel, and settled the accounts.  And drove to the TTC (yay!!! no more bridge!!!) Well, I did first.  Dave went to pick up Rachelle's stuff.  We all met for the Scott McNeil and Michael Benyaer panel.  We were kinda there really early, so we got good seats.  I got some video on my phone before my camera's memory and charge died; I'll upload when I can after the move, but I'm sure there's official video somewhere....

While waiting in line, we made arrangements to have lunch with a giant group of friends at Montana's.  To be honest, I think it's the first time I've been to the restaurant, and I kinda liked it. We had good food, and then dashed out to make it for the Awards Presentation for the Masquerade. Rachelle won TWO awards!!!  If you find footage of Anime North 2014 Masquerade, she's Burning Greymon.  She's trying to get me to enter next year.  I'm so-so about it.

Afterwards, Dave and I dashed into the Dealer's room with Ena and we all went our separate ways for a bit.  Ena went home soon after too.  I found myself more buttons, including ReBoot buttons!!!  I just need the yellow one.... then I'll have a complete set!! (this is also when I got KH Re:Coded)

We waited a while outside too, not sure what to do, cause traffic around the city and conventions is always rough.  We had beavertails. And then Brad and I decided to risk heading on the road, and said goodbye to Dave.  On our way out of the TCC, we saw Rachelle and waved at her.

We made good time through Toronto traffic once we got on the highway, and definitely made good time getting home.  Brad wore his Wolverine costume all the way.  We made it home about 8:45-ish.  And then I pretty much changed into my nightgown and fell into bed and slept for a long time.

And now I'm moving, yay!!!


Swing With Me

BOXES OF DOOM!!!! [
]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I'm PACKING!!!  There are BOXES everywhere!!!  except for when I run out of boxes and mope around feeling useless.

And then I go out and find more BOXES

Cause know what I found?  Not only is it me and T moving out next month, but D is as well!!!  so THREE PEOPLE trying to move out at once.  Well, guess what, I'm gonna try and get my non-essential stuff into boxes and move them to my parents place.  Hopefully Mom will let me take over the dining room for a bit, so I can store boxes out of the way.

Boxes, I need more boxes.  No Frills has some nice boxes.  I hear Food Basics do too.  Also like the storage boxes at Staples.  Things fit nicely into them, and they stack well.  Also, HANDLES!

I need to get some things from the dollar store, I think.  Basic cleaning things, dish towels, this and that. It can wait, I think.

Every once in a while, I think, is this really the right thing to do? Mostly in the quiet hours.  But then, I walk around and remember what all has happened, what could happen with two new housemates moving in.  I hear the creaking of doors, see the bugs crawling around, all the tiny little noises and mess of a shared living space, and I think "yes".

Of course remembering to take all of my meds helps too.

But packing helps too.  So I'm looking for more boxes.  I need a few more for books and all the little nicnacks I've collected over the years, and a nice big box for my gundams. I have ALL my DVDs, games, and VHS packed up, as well as school stuff and some desk stuff.

So. Many. Boxes.

How did I get so much STUFF??????

In a related matter, who needs my new mailing address?


2 Dreams Swing With Me

An Easter of Change [
]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Okay, so a lot has happened.  But I am pleased to announce that I will be moving in June.  Dad and I went to see this one apartment, and it looked good to us.  Well, we saw three apartments in the same building.  The first was a unit that's available May 1st, on the second floor.  It was cheaper, but needed more work done, as it used to belong to an elderly man who just went to a hospital and it was his family moving him out.

The one I'm moving into is on the fifth floor, has had younger people in and out of it, so the building people have been able to keep up on repairs more.  It's the same layout as the one of the second floor, just a few floors higher, and a bit more expensive.  Both face the west, so get a lot of afternoon sun, and have views of the neighbourhood and school, with a small wood/park area.

As the building is a bit more older than the other apartments in the area, the building owners are doing more repairs, but it's in good condition.  Hardwood floors, no carpets for me to worry about, which is better for allergies.  Plenty of closet space, and in areas that help with sound proofing, as if the cement walls won't be enough.  The rooms themselves aren't too big, so I won't be totally moving out of my parents, but it'll be enough for my first place.  Not quite big enough for a dinning room AND a study, so we elected for a study area, knowing full well I eat at my desk anyways.

But the kitchen is a bit larger than what they're building in the other places for the same price, and so is  the balcony.  Such a big balcony! Mother has found me a patio table and chairs for it.  She's also trying to find narrow counter table to put in the kitchen, so I'll have more space, because it still is quite small, especially once I get my appliances in.

We also saw a unit on the third floor.  It wasn't available, but the superintendent wanted us to see a unit that was fixed up, so we could see how the unit would look when I moved in.  

Easter Saturday, we managed to bring my mother (as well as my grandmother and uncle) along to revisit the second floor unit.  We took more accurate measurements and asked questions.  The supe assured us that the layout is exactly the same for the fifth floor unit, and I remember it being the same.  We double checked the floor building layout later online.

Monday, when the office was open, Mom, Dad, and I went and put down a deposit on the fifth floor unit.  Wednesday, I got things squared away with ODSP and my current place.  Thursday, Dad and I signed the lease.

So, I move in June.  I'm not sure exactly which date; I still need to make arrangements with the supe and I need to check with Uhaul on when I can get a truck.  The first of June is a Sunday, and most places aren't open on Sundays.... so I might have to move on Monday.... I need to go check.

But I've started packing.  Packing up books and things that I don't really need for the next month.  The past month or so I'd done some spring purging, and I'm still coming up with the occasional stuff that I'm sure I can get rid of, throw out, or whatever.

I've also started to realize how much I need to move out.  The previous reasons stand, but there's other things too.  I'm living in a house with people who aren't good for my health.  They aren't doing it on purpose, it's just kinda the side effect of living alongside them.  For four years, I've been living beside H, who uses so many scented things, it all merges into just this reek of scent.  I have to hold my breath when her door has been open.

And then there's the smokers.  Even if both B and D stood in smoking areas and the wind didn't blow it my way, there's such things as second hand and third hand smoke.  I can't go near the outside stairs anymore.  Sometimes, I can't stand to be near B if he's just had a smoke.  In the hallway right now, it reeks of smoke and weed, just the trail of second hand that has followed D in from outside.

With my allergies, with my asthma, years upon years of this, how has this affected my health? I have an air filter in my room, but given that my window is open and everything that comes and goes, including B entering my room, how effective can it be?  Especially when a lot of the common areas, I have no control over the products that other people use, whether people use scented things (D has been using cologne, really STRONG stuff), and whether or not they clean up after themselves.

To have my own place, where I can more or less control the mess, the products I use.  I have hope that it will be an improvement for my health, both physically and mentally.  When you live with people who are, one way or another, addicts, and you live with them for so long, you tend to be influenced by their lifestyle, even unconsciously.  At least, I find myself more and more doing so.  It might not be the people.  I don't know.  It might just be the system.  Mental health issues are so complicated that unless something breaks, it becomes a cycle that never ends between poverty and mental health and the social assistance system.  It all just feeds itself into this crushing despair.

Whether this is responsible for my sleeping issues, I don't know.  I just know that about a year ago, I started having trouble with my sleeping pattern, and have been unable to move it.  Hmm, right, I was going to contact the sleep clinic.  Maybe after all this settles down, I do have an award application to write.  Also, I'm waiting for news about the allergist...

But yes, I am looking ahead to moving.  Hopefully, there might even be a small moving party, but I don't know.  


1 Dream Swing With Me

Apartment of Rollercoaster and Possible Hope? [
]
[ mood | hopeful ]

So Dad had sent emails from China trying to do damage control, and he returned a few nights ago.

I went over Saturday before LARP (which was REALLY EXCITING, btw; draining, but EXCITING!!! I sometimes have NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING with rolls and such, but it's REALLY EXCITING) to talk over stuff.  Mom was in some sort of mood.  I'd look over a couple of locations, ask questions about my independence, and she'd just SNAP!!!

Some of you might have seen the posts.  Like, about an apartment near my parents.  Yes, granted, it's near the mall, relatively near services there, the library, and work.  However, I know those streets.  I've walked those streets for 20 years.  I know the traffic, I know the snow removal, I know the sidewalks, and the cement barriers, and the LACK OF SIDEWALKS in areas.  I also know myself, how I feel trying to rush out the door in the morning, stumbling home at night.  I know the bus system, as it stands, and where I need to go in the city much better than my mother does.

And I had concerns about how I would get groceries through snow on the streets when the buses don't actually run past the apartment, I'd have to haul it across the parking lot and down a lil' street with no sidewalk.  I tried to point out the locations that I had found in similar, if not possibly less (according to the website) price range TWO WEEKS AGO that I thought suited my needs better.  Mom pointed out that at her locations, I could borrow the car on weekends or when they didn't need it, and I said I didn't want to, that I wanted my independence and BAM!!!! I couldn't finish to say I would use the bus system, Mom just snapped!!  I was being greedy and selfish, and nothing was good enough for me, and I want a condo, and then a car, and that she couldn't do anything right, and should kill herself.

And NOTHING I said got through to her after that for a while.  She'd just twisted it into something ugly.
And it hurt, cause here I was, trying to think about my needs and to be independent, and to NOT be a burden and have to take up their money and resources, and feeling bad enough with the whole situation (Yes, both Dave and I think that there is a strong chance for this to NOT HAPPEN AT ALL, due to EMOTIONAL DRAMA like above), and now I feel like the black sheep scapegoat all over again like in high school.

I sat down, and tried to talk it over with Dad downstairs, as Mom yelled nonsense upstairs.  She wasn't even hearing all of what was said, and just yelling back based on what she THOUGHT she heard.  And just screaming that she was going to kill herself.

She calmed enough (sort of) for her to come down and me to explain myself (though I had to insist she listen to me all the way through without interrupting, because she has a habit of interrupting and not getting all the information that would counter the point of her interruption, which just causes more drama, cause I would get upset at being interrupted).

It gets a bit muddled, but they pulled up the list that I had sent them TWO WEEKS AGO!!!! And we managed to see an apartment.  And we also realized that there is a problem.  With the online listings.  Cause the listings online LIE.  Somewhat.  The listings START AT the price listed, but then most of the units available are another $100-200 more.  For some people like moi, that's a significant increase.

So during dinner, we planned that Monday (today, yay!) I would go to work (and not skip out to go watch the del Toro filming downtown, boo), and Dad would go to his appointments downtown, and swing by the retail office (yeah, one place has pretty much all the rental property in town here, it's disgusting) and meet with one of the agents there to look at ACTUAL LISTINGS that meet our budget.

Which we all did (and Mom went to work, of course).  And Dad got photos of the filming :D

But there is an apartment in the grouping of apartments that my Mom had taken me to a while back.  I had dismissed them previously, because when I had done my research, it appeared that most of the buildings were not all inclusive.  However, it appears that I am wrong, and there is at least one building.  It's also pet friendly.

I took a look at the information online, limited as it is, and it looks promising.  The location is pretty good.  Access not only to the bus hub and shopping area, but there's a walkway to a bus stop that'll be easier to catch the bus to work.  (It really is cheaper to take the bus).

Dad and I made plans to go to the office tomorrow.  Hopefully we can see the unit available.

Now I am trying to poke at things, get all the "oh, you need to do this" things out of my head so I can sleep.  I didn't sleep last night until 6AM, and I woke up at 10 to rush to work.  Since getting back, I've been resisting the urge to fall asleep, dozed off a bit in the bathtub.

Oh yes, been working on my cosplay staff a bit, and touching up my bracelets.  So all I really have to worry about is my skirt!!  Maybe once tomorrow happens, I can sew!!


Swing With Me

The Apartment is Dead (Most Likely) [
]
[ mood | crushed ]

So my mom had emailed me saying that she didn't want to see any places without Dad, that he wouldn't be around to move me until July anyways.  In other words, let's put the entire thing on hold till Dad gets home so my parents can find a place for me to live that's close to their house.  It has totally not past me by that all the places that they want me to live are in the west end, very close to work, but in two-plus bus routes for me to get anywhere, especially anywhere that my parents aren't involved.  Their solution to this is for me to GET RIDES WITH THEM.  

UUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

I emailed back saying that I was worried that if we wait, all the good apartments will be gone.  And that I had done research and already sorted, checked out bus routes, the neighbourhoods, etc.  All that's needed is to look inside.  I also mentioned that while last year I wasn't ready to move (and didn't really want to hear anymore of her guilt tripping, cause she was trying), I was really ready NOW, especially with housemates that drink too much and pass out in the front entrance (this would be the newest housemate, D).

TODAY I got an email from Mom saying that she's not signing a lease unless Dad's there, that they really do not have the money for this, that I'm bullying them for money, that the car needs fixing/is unfixable and apparently it's all my fault.  Everyone is feeling sick, and apparently, it's all my fault. Well, not all of it, just most of it.

And of course, this is on top of my Mom's medical issues (she hurt her knee, and the doctors have NO CLUE what's wrong, so she's on codeine, and on top of her OTHER medical issues, all the doctors are telling her to take medical leave and shit) so Mom Just Can't Cope.

So she's pulling the plug, because she won't pay money for me to "party".  "If it's so bad where you are", she says, "then take more shifts at work."

Right.  On ODSP, where they clawback 50% of your earnings.  While going to school.  While AUTISTIC, in a workplace that can and has been medically hazardous to me.  That for every shift, I immediately fall apart and SLEEP for a spell, unable to take care of myself.  But yes, let's forget all of this and take more shifts, just to get an apartment.  Let's totally throw away all my happiness, free time, social life, ability to self care, nevermind everything I've ever worked for in autism rights, etc, just for that apartment.

Fuck that shit.

My mother clearly has NO understanding of how delicate a system my self care is; that just LIVING WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN THIS HOUSE COUNTS AS SOCIAL INTERACTION.  Thus, the late bedtimes.   Every time B knocks on my door, it disrupts my recharge, and as it is, I AM CONSTANTLY IN A STATE OF RECHARGE because I'm constantly in contact with people.  Every time I hear some one, even if I'm in my room.  Every time I hear H in her room, D in his, and B outside, coughing while getting a smoke.  Usually the drain is slight, but it effects the recharge time.

Thus, there are days where NO PEOPLE ALLOWED.  I wear my headphones, and GO AWAY EVERYONE!!!

It really doesn't help that B has a hard time following my privacy instructions outside my door.  I've talked to him several times, I've talked to our case worker about it.  Our case worker has offered to sit in and help talk with him about it.  I could also try making a new sign outside my door with colours.... and maybe the social interaction badge system...

But really, I'm tired of feeling responsible for things in the house.  For house fund, for cleaning up around the house, for sorting the recycling, for printing out signs, recycling schedules, for everyone and this house in general.  I'm tired of other people's messes, of dishes that aren't always washed right, for my dishes that get put away with the general dishes, of sharing half a fridge and only having a cupboard.  I'm tired of SHARING, of only having my own room to call mine, of constantly dealing with other people whom I didn't even choice to live with.  Yeah, finally they aren't too bad, but it's not like when I was living with my friends, when we chipped in together and sharing food and taking care of each other.... and joked about our neighbours across the street getting arrested.

One of the solutions is to stop doing so much.  Stop printing things, stop sorting things.  Problem is, sometimes the recycling people won't pick up an entire box of stuff if there's one misplaced item on top (never mind it could have been some jerk walking past), and with the room that we have, we just can't do that.  And if I let our case worker print out and bring over things... well... then we have to wait until she has time to come over, and if she forgets..... then H messes up her schedule and we're back to the above.  

I could let some one else do house fund.  I've offered it up at house meetings.  But no one seems to want to do it.  So I'm stuck with it.  Apparently, I'm the most responsible person in the house.  Other than H, the rest of the people are boys who want to sit in their rooms, drinking, eating, watching TV and playing video games.  T will be moving out and into a bachelors in June.  I don't even want to know whether I'm ready for new housemate drama.  That's another thing I'm tired about.  Worrying about new housemates and how they're going to fit in, and all the drama that happens.

Sigh.  Gotta do something.

Since waking up, getting this news, and trying to type this, I've been poking around my room, taking out the recycling, staring into space and weeping.  I do think the time of year is playing a part in this.  April 1st deciding to hit a few days later and using this as a trigger. So I've been letting myself have a good cry.  And I ran out to get printer ink ($109!!!!!) since payday and gst came through.  Thinking of running out to go grab more comics.

Who knows?  Maybe next week there'll be an opening in one of the subsidized housing spots and I'm at the top of the list (ha!)

Now, I have a huge stack of comics that needs reading and it's been a rainy day.  To curl up with comics, or go play Rift? 


2 Dreams Swing With Me

The Condo Part Five [
]
[ mood | aggravated ]

So if I'm reading my Mom's emails right, the condo isn't happening.  All because she didn't read my email.


ARG!!!!!!!!!

So much time and energy and everything, because she DIDN'T READ THE EMAIL AND REALLY THING ABOUT IT!!!!!


**head desk**

So NOW she wants to look at apartments, and I'm just all frustrated and annoyed at the entire thing, because the places that are nice places are also pet-free.   And I have a big, fluffy cat.



why is everything so hard????


All I want is a two-bedroom apartment, under 1000$, all inclusive, in a certain area of town, that has enough space for my study, counter space in the kitchen, and allows for cats.  I can all of that, EXCEPT THE CAT PART, or else there's some REALLY CRUMMY KITCHENS in some apartments.  Like seriously, really????


2 Dreams Swing With Me

The Condo Part Four [
]
[ mood | frustrated ]

Sigh

So, Today/yesterday Mom and I took a look at the condo again.  I brought my iPad along and took pictures, which I have then put on my tumblr.   And now just saved them onto my computer.  (yay)

But we poked and prodded and looked into things.  I wanted the pictures because honestly, memory isn't that good with distances and spaces, so I wanted to have a rough idea of where to put things once moving started.

However.

Remember how I sent my mom an email that was mature and adult, with plans, or at least, the closest that Dave and I can get to plans at this time?  And reasonings for wanting an apartment over a condo, and all sorts of things?

Yeah, so while my mom says that she read it, I don't think she fully understood it.  Cause she was looking at the condo, realizing that it was smaller than she remembered, and then the more she looked, the more there were details that she wasn't happy about.  Now, granted, there are some things that could use changing should I be there in the long term, certain wallpaper and paint colours in the living room and hall, light fixtures, light switches.  MAAAAYBE the sink in the bathroom.

But Mom was coming up with stuff like re-doing the kitchen cupboards and the floors, and she wanted it in the buying and selling deal.  So she wasn't ready to put down an offer when we left.  Which is what she had said she was going to do.

Which confused me, because while there were things that I considered touch ups, I wasn't totally surprised that the condo was smaller than what we remembered, and was willing to work with the space there.  No biggie on my part. I mean, I'm just starting out, I don't know what I want in a place, so leaving a place as is and then fixing it up as we go suits me fine.  I just want a place that has enough space for me to MOVE INTO that I can afford (or the next best thing to being able to afford).

Yet, my mother.

She started asking me about my future plans, about what would happen should Dave move down.  Basically things that I had PUT IN THE EMAIL.  So she finally clued in that this was to be MY place, not a place that Dave will move into with me.  So she drags me to this other apartment, to at least see what a "newly fixed up place looks like".  And it was one of the places on the list I had given her IN MY EMAIL!!!!  In fact, it was the two-bedroom from when I was looking for one-bedrooms (not expecting to move ALL MY STUFF with me).

So now she realizes that I intend to stay in the condo "only" one to three years, which she says is "not worth it"?  Which confuses me, cause it's still a long time, cause I'm expecting this to be my place until 1) Dave finds a job in Kingston, and 2) until Dave and I can find a place TOGETHER in Kingston.  Or else somewhere else.  Which MIGHT (but hopefully not) take 1-3 years.  In which case, my parents have paid off the loan they'll have to take out to buy the condo.  And we can sell the condo, and use the money for other things.  Like their retirement.

SIGH!!!

So to me, it feels like I'm back at the beginning, expect now there are two potential units that are at risk of slipping past us.  And my future housing is, once again, in the hands of my parents decision.  Not entirely pleased at the lack of control over the situation.  But then, it's the radiation of my life lately, just general lack of options and control, thanks to systems of control and restrictions on the lives of people on social assistance.

But now, it's a question of how much financial support do my parents want to give me for housing?  $5,000 a month, with a secure, in good condition place to live, or about $5,000 a year, with an apartment that is smaller and may not have adequate cooking space?

And in the meanwhile, MY BRAIN IS STILL TRYING TO ARRANGE FURNITURE FOR THE CONDO!!!!!


Swing With Me

The Condo Part Three [
]
[ mood | excited ]

Yeah, I thought that The Condo was turning into the Apartment, but apparently not!!!

I sent my mom a list of apartments that I thought looked interesting, and I requested information for my top choice.

Mom kept sending me condo information.

I got a call from the super at the apartment, and arranged an appointment to see the apartment, at a time that Mom and Dad could attend as well, and notified them of it.  I felt very mature and accomplished for this, taking charge and doing things and such.  Which no one seemed to notice.

Mom kept sending me condo information.

Talked with Mom, and agreed to go with her to see condos on her list after seeing the apartment.

And today was the day of the viewing, we saw the apartment and three condos.  One we flat out rejected, and the last two we debated about.  I went home with them and worked out an estimated budget.  From the looks of it, I could manage the monthly fees of the more expensive unit and have about $190 in wiggle room.

(Of course, I need to do something about that $1, 561.58 credit card bill....)

So, my parents went up to the bank to go talk to people to see whether they can get the money to buy the condo.
I feel bad for putting this on my parents, although I fully understand that they offered to do this.  The resulting loan means that both of them cannot retire and have to work full time for another three years (unless, I hate to say this, my grandmother passes away, and/or my brother somehow pays off half of the estate used to buy his house)

It's not going to be a done deal right away either; Dad takes off to China for a few weeks again, so it won't be until mid-April when the papers for the loan get signed.  So I'm not sure when I'd start moving in. This is assuming we won't be interested in the townhouse that we're viewing tomorrow.  However, this does seem very likely.  It's a nice building, well cared for, and while in what Mom calls a high population area, it's quiet and on the route of two bus routes that I can easily use to get to work and get groceries, not to mention the main routes and the malls.  The routes may even be better than where I am now, given the new bus system.

If this does work out, I'm not entirely sure I'll be able to finish my cosplay for Anime North.  Yeah, I'm going to try, but I'm also prepared for the reality that between school, work, and moving, Mom and I may not have enough time to work on my skirt (which is a shame, I just need to finish the skirt and the staff and it's all ready to go).  I don't want to do the skirt on my own, because it's EXPENSIVE cloth (like, $30-50/meter; beaded wedding satin) and we're doing pleating and stuff that I don't really know how to do.

So.  I wait until Mom and my schedule's work out and we're both good for sewing.  If it happens, it happens.  If it doesn't, it doesn't, and I'll spend a convention in mundane clothes for once in a long time.  I'm not going to worry about it, and I'm getting very good at not worrying about it.


And now, let's see whether my brain will stop trying to arrange furniture so that I can sleep tonight.  


1 Dream Swing With Me

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